#insaneasylumblog- Throughout history there have been laws passed and removed from the books. Depending on what era you grew up in, I'm sure all the laws made sense at that time. As time has progressed, some of the laws that could be deemed crazy, weird or just plain stupid have managed to slip through the filter and remain intact. In this series, we will be taking a look at dumb laws that are still on books in these here United States. Sixth in the series... Colorado.
1. Couches may not be placed on outside porches. Now, let me begin by saying that, honestly, I don't think this law is dumb at all. They need this law here in Alabama, only it needs to be revised to include no refrigerators on the porch and and no using the front porch or the bushes in front of your house to dry clothes on. I'm just saying...
2. It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next door neighbor. Once again, a law we need here in Alabama. It also needs to include no lending of sugar, flour, toilet paper or feminine hygiene products. Yes, someone actually asked to 'borrow' the last two. My response, "That's okay. You can keep it. I don't want it back."
3. It is illegal to have weeds in your yard. Hmmm... So, the weed I have in the house is okay?
4. It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep. Well, so much for being romantic in the mornings on your way to work. Just throw that sweet love note away and wake her up and tell her goodbye.
5. It is illegal to crash into obstacles on a ski slope. One of the very reasons I will not be visiting Colorado any time soon. I would like to one day learn to ski, but I know me. I would be crashing into everything. Guess I need to become something like an expert before visiting this place though. Who wants to go to jail so far from home?
6. In Denver, it is illegal for barbers to give massages to nude customers unless it is for instructional purposes. Can someone please help me understand why the customer in a barbershop would be nude? And what kind of instructions could you be getting from a barber other than tips on the art of shaving? Maybe it's a full body shave... Yeah...
7. It is illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out on the streets after 7 p.m.. This one reminds me of my grandmother and how she would tell us that wearing red was for 'bad' women. Red somehow symbolized being a whore. So growing up the rule was no red lipstick and no red nail polish. I was a very rebellious child...
8. In Sterling, cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight. Show me the person who can manage to stick a light in a cats tail, and I will shake his hand. With a glove on, of course.
9. It is illegal to drive a black car on Sunday. I'm assuming they may think it's a hearse or something. Wouldn't want to feel like you've missed out on a funeral I guess...
10. And last, but not least, Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored on hotel mini-bars in anything larger than miniature containers. Hey, lets just cut down on the confusion, give me mine in a fifth bottle and I'll just sit the damn thing on top of the mini-bar. I'm versatile like that.
Okay, friends... Are any of you from Colorado? Do you know of any other crazy laws that are still on the books? Share them here!
Deuces, Smooches...
Nena Grace
